Top Answer
- Honestly; I'd be conflicted if I was in the same situation. I think that it's honestly fair-play if that is one of the reasons why you refuse.
- If you love him for what he is, you aren't shallow at all, on the contrary. Being embarrassed when in public with him, that's normal. Peer pressure. You are afraid people will judge you, and start imagining things and gossiping, and you are right to be.You don't have to hang out with him in public. We all have our little secrets. Hell, that's why you're posting anonymously on an onion forum, and that's why I'm also answering anonymously on the same onion forum.
From what I understand, deep down, you love him, and that's all that matters. Let other people do their thing and think what they think; the mere fact you're worrying about being shallow tells me you are better than that. Plus, the "homeless" and "grey teeth" parts of him can probably be fixed, right?
- it's not unreasonable for you to have reservations about a man who has absolutely nothing going for him aside from you having feelings for him...
look, you didn't judge him based on shallow things, you showed him that you can love him.... what is he showing you?
let him show something, tell him to show he cares enough about you to improve his situation... clean up, get a job, or at least a toothbrush, lol.....
if he's unable/unwilling to clean up his own act for you, then you shouldn't be willing to do it for him, as that's a bad place to start any relationship.....
give him a chance to do a few things for himself first..... if he cant/wont, then you'll know he's looking for more than a love interest, he's looking for a mommy... someone to take care of him despite his inability to do so for himself.... you'll know what to do. - That... is quite shallow indeed. In fact, I personally would be embarassed to even be seen in the same room as you. And I know that is quite judgemental of me to say without knowing you but still, shallowness is just one of those things I feel we have far too much of in this world.
Having said that, there obviously is an aspect to this which is outside of your control.
Because, why do you feel embarassed? It's the subconscious idea that you will be judged by family, friends, etc, etc, etc. It's the pressure from people in your life that is making you feel shallow. So, you are not entirely at fault here really.
Anyhow, he is homeless... he is not terminally ill. His life could still be turned around. Why not simply accept him fully into your life and helping him get back on his feet? Sure, at first other peopel in your life might judge you for engaging in a relationship with someone like him but, eventually they should warm up to your efforts to bring out the best in him.
>That is what romance is about, to a good extent... it's not just about sex or about watching movies together while cuddled up on a couch. A romantic relationship, a good, long term relationship is about lifting each other up. Bringing out the best in each other.
So... give him the chance he deserves... and, while you're at it... give yourself a chance too. - if u want to keep all the good bits about him u need to invest in him pay to get his teeth sorted and tell him he needs to sort himself out give him incentive u must have connections to get him work or if ur flush just help him dnt be embarrassed follow ur gutt feeling
- I just wonder how you met this guy though... And if his teeth are so bad why do you go after him anyways?
But lets be honest: If you love him then you should move in together with him, so he atleast has a home now and can go looking for a job or whatnot. He probably has a hard time getting back up on his feet.
It is kind of cruel to fuck him and also say you love him but then reject him because he is homeless. You dont need to date a homeless person, but you do, and once you did it became obsolete that hes homeless.
====
do you have answer? comment below